RED started off so well. We're introduced to the main character, Frank, a retired CIA badass who's trying to woo Sarah, a customer support lady at his pension company by calling her every few days pretending his cheques haven't arrived. It's all very sweet. Then we're shown just how much ass he can kick when a wetwork team randomly invades his home. He kicks lots of it. Finally, assuming he's no longer safe to hang around, he merrily trots off to pay a surprise visit to Sarah in Kansas.

And this is pretty much where the film breaks from an interesting character story with some sweet...